Sunday, December 4, 2011
I have greatly slacked on my blog due to the fact that life can be so hectic sometimes... But I am back and ready to explain more on our journey. Regarding my last post... The results from my laproscopy showed that the dr was unable to find a cause behind my pain and released me stating that I would hopefully not have anymore pain after I got pregnant. I guess he failed to realize that I have been pregnancy challenged for 2 and a half years! So we decided to take a break from Dr.s for a little while and try again to conceive without fertility treatments which isn't working either. It is a daily struggle for us to face the world knowing that there are babies born everyday into homes that are not stable or safe for them to be in but yet we cannot conceive. We try to live it up while we can but in the back of my mind I always think about wether I am going to get pregnant this month or not. It just feels like I have something missing in my life and no matter how hard I try I can't seem to fill the void. My husband and I have gotten better at putting on our "brave face" so that the world will not ask us why we can't be happy. It's hard trying to explain to people the hurt we feel when they don't understand how it feels to he infertile. Every time we see a pregnancy announcement or see a child smile up at their parents it brings a whole new wave of depression knowing that we may never experience that happiness. I know that everything happens for a reason and that the Lord will provide in time but it still doesn't ease the pain any. I guess this is a good enough post for today I have a million things that need to be done!